i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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