Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize