dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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