Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
