Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
