we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
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