Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
