I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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