Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
