Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
