The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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