I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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