so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
