Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
