We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
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