I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
