Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
As shirtless as possible
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize