I love black thongs
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
