I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
