Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize