Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Alive.
So much puke
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
