youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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