508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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