bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
