Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize