the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
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