we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Your cock deserves a montage
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
