i permit you to call me
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
