Where is the hickey?
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I deserve to be covered in dicks
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize