I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
