This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Randomize