I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
