I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Is it penis luge time yet?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
