you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
