Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
