Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
this just has baby written all over it
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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