I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
