Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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