i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize