The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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