Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
