you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
