Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
