Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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