i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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