Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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