It's Friday. Sex?
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Randomize
