That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
