His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
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