great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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