I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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